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A decade ago, Talitha Rarasty thought marriage was the end goal.
"It's like an achievement and a template in human life," she said.
"You go to school, university, get married, have kids, and if your life's not according to this template, you are deemed unsuccessful."
But as she approaches her 36th birthday, she has not met a husband.
Ms Rarasty works as a makeup artist for wedding events and often wonders when she will get married herself.
"All of my friends my age are married," she said.
"And yet here I am, almost 36 [and single] … not because I don't want to get married, but because I haven't found the one."
Ms Rarasty is not alone in her struggle to find a husband.
The number of "young" Indonesians getting hitched has been falling for at least a decade.
In 2014, 2.1 million Indonesians got married. In 2024, that number was just 1.47 million.
According to the country's Central Statistics Agency, as of December, fewer than 30 per cent of Indonesians aged 16 to 30 were married.
Desintha Dwi Asriani, a sociologist at Gadjah Mada University in Yogyakarta, said marriage was no longer just about a wedding and having children.
"Things like housing, raising children and daily expenses become key considerations that make people feel that getting married requires substantial economic resources," Dr Asriani said.
But she said marriage was still "encouraged" in Indonesia, where religion and culture were important.
"Marriage is still seen as a stage in human life that reflects a person's maturity and moral standing," she said.
"Family is considered very crucial as an institution where nationalist values and religious teachings are instilled."
'Marriage is scary'
While marriage remains a priority for many people, finding a partner has become complicated because of online dating problems in Indonesia.
Ms Rarasty tried dating apps, but eventually quit the platforms after repeatedly meeting married men or men who were already in relationships.
"When I was younger, I didn't feel as sceptical toward men," she said.
"But now, there's so much information about men [and their red flags] and scams [on the dating apps], so I've become more careful before taking any steps."
Relationship coach Rastrianez, who has only one name, said negative experiences online had sparked fear and doubt among young people looking to marry.
"Marriage is scary" once became a social media trend in Indonesia, particularly on TikTok, where most users are Gen Z.
Users said they feared their future partner would cheat on them, neglect their children, or that they would simply meet the wrong person or someone who was not religious enough.
Ms Rastrianez added that being presented with too many options on dating apps posed a challenge.
"When we are faced with too many options, we tend to overthink … because we're stuck with the idea that there's always someone better."
A combination of these factors meant more young Indonesians were ditching dating apps and trying different approaches to find a partner, Ms Rastrianez said.
Face-to-face dates a success
One of these strategies includes displaying single people's CVs in shopping centres.
Matchmaking service Cindo Match became well-known for this approach, exhibiting a collection of CVs in shopping centres or at events.
Images of people displayed on the CVs are generated by artificial intelligence.
To see their real images, the service's customers pay 150.000 rupiah ($12.50) to view three and 250,000 ($20) to view six.
The customer is also given the CV-owners' contact details, with their consent.
Cindo Match co-founder Angeline Chandra said the model was inspired by China's traditional "marriage markets".
Ms Chandra said face-to-face matchmaking events held by the service "surprisingly were always successful".
She said at least 40 couples were dating and two had married as a result of her business' face-to-face matchmaking services.
Her clients, most of whom were millennials, told her they were against dating apps and preferred offline interactions.
"Dating apps [are] a big no-no because there's a lot of scams and quite a few of my members actually got scammed too," she said.
"And most of my clients are working and don't have time for activities other than work, which limits them from meeting and interacting with new people [in person]."
Ms Chandra said it was interesting to see marriage rates plummeting, as her clients told her they still wanted to get married.
Money was one of the barriers delaying marriage, Ms Chandra said.
"Nowadays, people need to work hard to be sustainable," she said.
"Especially in Indonesia, where buying a house is very difficult for certain income groups … which affected the desire to get married."
Government provides free weddings
To help Indonesians who can not afford to get married, the country's Ministry of Religion has begun funding mass weddings.
About 50 couples turned up at the Istiqlal Mosque in December, where they were given a dowry, food packages, wedding gifts and photo sessions.
About 200 couples attended two other mass weddings the ministry organised in June and September.
"They will stay at a free hotel tonight and get 2 million rupiah ($166) to start a business," said Religious Affairs Minister Nasaruddin Umar after the September event.
But sociologist Dr Asriani said that society's view of marriage had also shifted, and the institution of marriage needed to be more broadly analysed and discussed by the government.
"I think if the government seeks to increase the marriage rate, they should think about how to improve the appeal [beyond offering financial help]," she said.
The Indonesian government has been contacted for comment.
While Ms Rarasty still wants to get married, she has made peace with her current situation.
"I've tried my best, I've looked after myself, worked hard and kept myself open," she said.
"But I believe it's not the time yet, so I will make peace with the situation and enjoy my life as a single woman."
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